It also got me to thinking that I should have a question and answer section of my blog. As a Researcher by trade, I trust myself to be able to find the answers people need quickly and legitimately. So if anyone has any wedding-related questions about weddings in Minnesota, same-sex weddings, or creative weddings--shoot 'em my way!
Back to the IL Civil Unions question--Jen wrote:
Hello, I was hoping I could ask you a few questions. I know that you and your fiancé are getting married in just a few months. As I’m sure you know, Illinois is passing Civil Union laws and I have girlfriend, girlfriends, who are planning on getting married. They are going to city hall and getting their certificate and then a few days later they are having a ceremony, which I know you have to wait at least one day to have a ceremony. But my question is, by them going and getting the certificate, is that all they need to be married by the state? Or is the ceremony needed and does an officiate need to be present? I’m not sure if you have the answers, but if you have any insight or a website that you can direct me to, please do.
Thanks,
Jen
and congrats
My answer:
Hi! Thanks for the congratulations!
My understanding is that they just need to go to City Hall and obtain a license from the city clerk. They could also choose to exchange vows before a secular or religious official (if the religion approves of same-sex unions) and then they can register their union. I don't believe that there needs to be an officiant present. What I'm not sure on is if the registration process is the same process as the obtaining the license from the clerk. I imagine it is. They could call their local city clerk to find out if they wanted to be certain. They should also ask if they will need a witness. We are having a friend officiate our ceremony even though it isn't legal just because we want to have a traditional ceremony.
If they plan to change their names they should also start that process in advance of getting the civil union license. I am not sure if Illinois has a process in place yet for name changes upon application for a civil union. In Minnesota, Jesse and I will be able to change our names using one name-change application because our main residence is within Minneapolis, where there is Domestic Partnership recognition. It's basically the one things we get that is just like an opposite-sex couple. Assuming that both of the members of that couple were changing their names, which is pretty rare. Still, it's kind a big deal, symbolically at least.
What I suggest same-sex couples do if they want to have the licensing be part of the ceremony, if they have already obtained the official license at City Hall, is to have an artist create a marriage license or poster for all the guests present at the ceremony to sign. It can be something as simple as a frame with the Civil Union license copied onto a larger piece of paper with lines underneath it. Jesse and I will have one of these for guests to sign at our wedding and it will say something like, "Witnesses to the Marriage of..." Of course I'm still designing our invites that need to get out this week so I'm not really sure if it will Actually end up looking like that for ours. I've seen a lot of other couples do it though and I think it's lovely. There are a ton of people who make posters like this on Etsy if you search under Marriage Poster or Certificate. Here is an example.
If they plan to change their names they should also start that process in advance of getting the civil union license. I am not sure if Illinois has a process in place yet for name changes upon application for a civil union. In Minnesota, Jesse and I will be able to change our names using one name-change application because our main residence is within Minneapolis, where there is Domestic Partnership recognition. It's basically the one things we get that is just like an opposite-sex couple. Assuming that both of the members of that couple were changing their names, which is pretty rare. Still, it's kind a big deal, symbolically at least.
What I suggest same-sex couples do if they want to have the licensing be part of the ceremony, if they have already obtained the official license at City Hall, is to have an artist create a marriage license or poster for all the guests present at the ceremony to sign. It can be something as simple as a frame with the Civil Union license copied onto a larger piece of paper with lines underneath it. Jesse and I will have one of these for guests to sign at our wedding and it will say something like, "Witnesses to the Marriage of..." Of course I'm still designing our invites that need to get out this week so I'm not really sure if it will Actually end up looking like that for ours. I've seen a lot of other couples do it though and I think it's lovely. There are a ton of people who make posters like this on Etsy if you search under Marriage Poster or Certificate. Here is an example.
I hope that that was helpful for you! Let me know if you have any other questions!
Cheers,
Alyson
And here is a link to another post about marriage poster guestbooks!
